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Life Changes

 It has been a very long time since I have posted on here and there is a good reason why. The main reason has been the overwhelming amount of work that I do, working 11 days on and only having 3 days off doesn't give me enough time to do everything. Although, I love my job it can be a lot and I do find that the evenings don't give me enough time to relax and catch up with things and weekends are always full of seeing family, the food shop and any thing else we need to get done. But I guess the other reason for me being so distant from my blog is the life changes which we are now facing.

This year has been a bit of a whirlwind and to be honest the days, weeks and months seem to have flown by and I cannot believe it. As I am writing this post, I am closing in on my third trimester, yep we are expecting our first child and I couldn't be more happy. A lot has changed in our lives the past 2 years, with a global pandemic where we spent months without family, we realised just how much family means to us. We had a discussion about a family before but the pandemic (although still going on) was a huge part of us waiting a bit before we would start. When we found out we were expecting we decided to keep it a secret until we had our first scan, we didn't want to get ahead of ourselves until we knew that it was actually happening. The first scan was scary to say the least, not knowing if everything was ok, not even sure if anything was actually in there and having to go by myself was very nerve racking. But, the moment the ultrasound started, I was told congratulations. It was happening and there was a human being inside me, heart beating and growing. Coming home with the scan picture was amazing and getting to tell our families was overwhelming, everyone was incredibly happy for us both and it just made the experience even more exciting.

But then the anxiety started. The part they don't really tell you about, the time between having your scan and visiting the midwife. This time was one of the stressful, anxious times of my pregnancy so far. It's hard to explain, but not being able to feel, see or hear your baby makes you panic that something was wrong. During this time I did contact the maternity mental health service and honestly one of the best things I did. It was so helpful and gave me tips and advice to tackle the anxiety of different stages of pregnancy. But, getting to hear our baby's heart beat again just made me anxiety relax and prepare for the second scan at 20 weeks.

The second scan, my partner was allowed to come with me and that made the experience all that more amazing. Our little baby on the screen, both of us seeing the head, spin, fingers, toes and finally getting to find out the sex. We didn't mind what we were having but I can't lie we did have a preference so when we found out we were having a boy we were beyond happy. I could also start to feel him kick which was and is an amazing experience. Although, we have a happy and healthy baby I do have some issues which are monitored closely. Unfortunately, I have placenta previa, which is where the placenta is at the bottom of the uterus and sometimes can cover the cervix (I know TMI) and after a secondary scan it was found that it is covering the cervix. This has not really bothered me as much as I thought it might, I think this is because I do not have any birth plan expectations, so it has not spoilt my plans at all. This was a big thing that was discussed by the mental health midwives, as it can be difficult to come to terms with changes in your plan. 

Now I am a week away from the third trimester and he is kicking like crazy and we cannot wait for him to be here, but we are definitely not completely ready for his arrival. There is still so much to do but we are getting there. Though, I have developed PGP (Pelvic Grindle Pain) which has meant I haven't been able to do as much as I normally can do. But, we are beavering on and I cannot wait to finally see the nursery finished and finally fold up all his clothes we have so far. Being due on the 11th December, Christmas this year is going to be unlike any other and hopefully for the best reason of all. After all the turmoil and bad news for last year this is the best news and best change in our lives we could ask for.

Stay Gorgeous


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